Brooke's 30th Birthday extravaganza at The Red Canary

Man o man what a night.  If anyone could make a room forget how bad the Blackhawks are playing, it's Jim and Brooke!  The who's who of drunkards where out last night.  You would have thought prohibition had just ended.

On to the host Jim. Can this guy pick a hot spot or what?  No really, it was so hot, he made every one of Brooke's friends that much more unattractive.  I couldn't tell if I was at a lounge or slaughter house.  My friend and hairstylist to the stars, Flea ( Sho Studio, 357 w. Chicago Ave, 312 867 7461), couldn't hold down her caviar and shooter oyster topped dragon sushi or Perrier Jouet Cristal Brut 1990 "Methuselah"!  She said it reminded her of all those burn victims she witnessed when Lockport High School burned in 1988.  Never the less, Jim did a great job. Of not buying anyone a drink!  Cheap fuck!  Hope that chandelier your looking into buy one day falls on your neck and leaves you just short of Christopher Reeves you Superasshole!  Speaking of people falling off horses,  was that Howl at the Moon we were at last night cause that place was for the dogs.

On to the the vivacious Brooke.  Man, what a woman.  God created woman and he must have had a huge erection after making you!  As you can see from the picture above, a perfect 10.  Every time you see her you just want to give her a big hug.  It helps that she's stacked in the boobage area and has an ass sweeter than Yoohoo.  I'm happy to say that after 3 hugs,  i may be diabetic.

In conclusion, a marvelous job Jim!  Next year, we should probably have her birthday party at a petting zoo.  Brooke's friends will be comfortable and fed lots of corn and hay.